Recently, I wrote about 3 things that are necessary for success: Talent, Skill, & most importantly, Courage! Without courage, you won't DO anything with your talents & skills. Your capabilities will sit like trophies on shelves - no thanks! I don't want to miss out on what God could do through me. Give that post a read if you haven't yet. I share how I found my courage & how you can too.
Taking the topic of courage a step further... What if I told you there is someone sabotaging your courage? Trying to take it down every day. What if I told you that the person sabotaging your courage is YOU? COMPARISON is the name of your COURAGE's greatest rival. Not the person who's more successful than you. Not the coach who doesn't believe in you. Not the person who received the promotion you pined for. Not the girl who gets more attention than you. Nope. YOU comparing yourself to that person or situation is what's holding back your courage. Believe me, if you're struggling with comparison, it's holding you back more than you can afford. You (& I!) must break free from the comparison trap in order to move forward! Meet your new life motto: "STAY IN YOUR LANE." I was a very competitive kid. This led me to constantly compare myself to others - especially my older sister & peers. You'll get what you look for in this life, so I was always able to find a comparison. I often used my older sister's success as a benchmark & tried to find happiness by matching her achievements. I needed the approval of others & felt useless if I wasn't the best or above average in a class or activity. You feel me, anyone?? Looking at what I accomplished as a kid, I'm thankful I had such strong drive - drive doesn't have to be a bad thing. I had great support at home, & I think my parents knew that my feistiness toward life would serve me well if I could channel it properly. I'm sad I fell into the comparison trap so often, but I'm thankful that I know better now! I believe competitive spirit can propel people into new levels of success, so I will never say being competitive is a bad thing. It just needs to be channeled correctly! Why? Well, I believe you can be competitive without being comparitive. It's a fine line, but once you find it & stay on it, you'll be a force to be reckoned with! I've seen this firsthand in my husband's hockey career. He's undoubtedly the most competitive person I know. I've always loved his drive & ambition. It's something that connected us from the start & continues to connect us. He's a driven, talented athlete who has big goals for the future, but he knows that in order to do his best, he must continue to focus on his own development rather than how he compares to others. When athletes channel their competitive nature this way, they don't just become better athletes-they become better teammates & better role models! Rocco knows he must STAY IN HIS LANE to succeed! Speaking of sports, Rocco & I watched the Olympics EVERY night last summer! Did you see that viral picture of Michael Phelps & another swimmer? The one where Phelps is focused on swimming forward & the other swimmer is focused on Phelps? Guess who won that race! STAY IN YOUR LANE. I believe most "Greats" have became "Greats" because they were so competitive with their own personal limits that - eventually - their best became the world's best. Being better than those around you will only take you so far. But being better than who you were yesterday is a pathway to personal success that is much more meaningful & fruitful, even if you don't end up on top. STAY IN YOUR LANE. It's hard to be great at something when you're so focused on your competition. Satan loves to distract. If he can't keep you from realizing your talent, he'll distract you from becoming your best by sidetracking you in the traps of comparison. Don't let that happen! STAY IN YOUR LANE. As a musician, I fight the urge to compare every day. In high school, I decided that being a jealous girl in the music world is stupid: Why would I envy the creativity/voice/mind of another artist? My art will be its best when I focus on what I can do. Keep your eyes on what God has for YOU, & you won't be so susceptible to covet another's path! STAY IN YOUR LANE! It's easier for comparison to become a habit. The more you compare, you worse you feel. After a while, you're more than insecure...you're JEALOUS. There are few things worse than insecurity turned into jealousy towards someone. Why is jealousy such a big deal? Sin says: "Me being jealous is just in my mind-it won't hurt anyone anyway..." Wisdom says: That jealousy will fester inside, making you discontent & bitter. It will inhibit your relationships & fuel your insecurity. Jealousy will eat you alive. You will be unable to be happy for others because you will so wrapped up in what you do not have. When you covet pieces of someone's life, you miss out on what God has already blessed you with. Sin says: "It's not like that person will know I'm jealous..." "God will forgive me anyway..." Wisdom says: That jealousy will hurt those you are jealous toward. Hurt people hurt people. Jealousy can bring you to the point where you exclude, bring down, & bully the person you are jealous of. Boys may not understand, I'm sure anyone who's ever been a high school girl will. I'm sure you've been on both sides of the jealousy coin at some point. Both sides are BAD NEWS. Whether you're jealous or being mistreated...STAY IN YOUR LANE. To the girl who feels disliked for no reason, I have been blown-off & low-key bullied more times than I could count. It just happens when you're happy with your life or good at something. Some people assume my bubbly personality is fake & decide they don't like me. Don't be arrogant, but it's not your job to make others like you. You don't need to "dull your sparkle" just so others won't be jealous of your gifts. Share them humbly with the world, & the right people will come into your life - people who will wish the best for you & lift you UP! If you're dealing with jealous/unhappy people, do all you can to uplift & support them. In time, they may just turn around. 3 STEP TO STAY IN YOUR LANE: 1. Find your lane so there's no need to look around. A great pastor at my childhood Bible camp said in order to know yourself, you must know God. We study artists to understand their work. We must know God to understand His creation, you & me. Once you understand your God-given purpose, you can start living a meaningful, satisfying life. Once you're satisfied with your own life, you can combat the temptation to envy another's life! 2. Don't be ashamed of your competitive spirit or ambition. It's a gift. Just make sure you channel it correctly. Confide in a wise friend/mentor & ask them to hold you accountable in this! 3. Stay in your lane once you get there & keep moving forward. This isn't a once-&-done life lesson. It's a lesson you review frequently. You must continually fuel your relationship with God in order to stay in the lane He's placed you in. He'll take you farther than you could ever go on your own & take you there in the most meaningful route. Trust God with your future & draw near to Him today! People need what you have to offer. Reminder that you have been #BornToShine & gifted with things this world needs! Keep trucking & remember to STAY IN YOUR LANE. Wishing you confidence & joy in Jesus, Abby Grimaldi
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In my world there are 2 types of friends (both important): The "let's go get coffee" friends & the "let's go for a walk" friends. I'm the "let's go for a walk" friend! Especially in the summer. My family says I'm like a puppy because I have too much energy for my own good. That being said, I NEVER drink coffee & I spend a lot of time working out- it's for the best, believe me! If you've seen Rocco & my Instagram stories, you know we have too much energy to begin with! Haha
Anyway, I'm 23, & most of my friends are around my age. From what I remember, in high school we all assumed life would be figured out by 25. We'd all be college graduates, working our dream jobs, & happily married. Settled for life! Hmm... The more people in their early 20's that I talk to, the more I notice a trend - We are ALL still figuring it out! Not a single person I have talked to has it all together. And guess what? That's OK! I believe God has so much goodness in store for His children...beautiful friendships, job opportunities, a lifelong spouse, faithful friends, etc. It's easy to look through your Instagram feed & think everyone's perfectly content & sure of where they're going! I'm guilty of comparison too sometimes. I'm thankful to be a college graduate & a happy wife, but there are still a number of details in my life that I am waiting on God to align! Ever throw yourself a personal pity party? Ever get wound up with worries for the future? Ever compare your life to a specific person's life? Ever feel like no one could relate to or understand your situation? Truthfully, I have felt all of those things & more at some point or another! I'm guessing you have too. I consider myself to be a young, yet faithful servant of the Lord...but I still struggle with gratitude & trust at times. If you do too, you're not alone! Read the Old Testament & you'll see how many times the Israelites (God's chosen people) did too. (MANY TIMES.) Here's what I'm getting at: 1.) The more people I "talk life" with, the more I see...that we're all dealing with the same things. Yep! The same things. Just packaged differently! We all have different holes in our hearts, just like we all have certain tangible gaps in our lives. Only Jesus can bring us fulfillment. No one "has it all,," even the ones you may think really do! Why do so many athletes/celebrities get intense depression at the peaks of their careers? Maybe they've experienced the emptiness of "having it all" without having Jesus, the real "ALL in ALL." This girl has a great job & money to spare but is lonely. That girl has a husband & healthy baby but struggles financially. This guy has a wife & job but he feels he is settling in his career path. That guys has a big family & all the money in the world but a sick child. Not to make up dramatic scenarios, but we ALL have something. 2.) You could spend your whole life waiting on dreams, guidance/signs, opportunities, promotions, relationships, etc to align...but you shouldn't. You can bloom right where you're planted. & you should try to. While you may not be where you want to be, you might be there someday. But maybe you won't. Maybe you won't ever "have it all." What if God takes you a new direction? What if you find new dreams? Why be so fixated on your ideal life when it may end up changing with time anyway? And what if you do eventually get all that you used to dream of? I guarantee there's something else you'll end up wishing for or complaining about. I'm quickly learning that no one has ever arrived. We are all on unique journeys with God. Different timelines & destinations. Different dreams & callings to fulfill. The only thing that will satisfy is Jesus. Regardless of how your life pans out, the true fulfillment is in Him. That being said, there's no reason why you can't live the best life you can. God wants to bless your life, & this starts with 1. contentment in Him & 2. the choice to bloom where you're planted! There are always things you wish you could change in your life. But once you get over the idea of "waiting for the ideal life scenario" for your dreams to come true...you can finally be free from the waiting game & move forward like you've always dreamt of doing! & maybe, just maybe, that's when your dreams can START coming true! Because of Rocco's hockey career, we move constantly. (At least it's exciting!) God continually reminds me to BLOOM where I am PLANTED. (No waiting around to enjoy my life when the scenario is just right. Life will never be just right!) This means I immediately find a church & gym wherever we go. It also means I keep pumping up my spiritual muscles & spending time on developing my talents. I never know where we'll be living next or how long or short we'll be there, so it's imperative that I embrace every season of life. I believe it's imperative for YOU to do the same too. Are you blooming or remaining stagnant lately? Earlier this year, I battled lies from the enemy. He told me every single day that I was doing nothing with my life. That I wasn't gifted enough to do anything signifant. That I would never see dreams come to pass. I hit a point where I clearly knew that these thoughts were (((LIES))) from the enemy. He was coming against all that he was afraid I was getting ready to do for the kingdom of God! And once I realized that, I got mad. In the best way possible. I practiced harder. I wrote more music. I started writing blogs. & encouraging clerks at Target. & worshipping God with confidence & tears of joy. I faced the enemy's lies head-on & fought for my future! I declared God's goodness & promises over me. After a crazy year, I am a tougher force to be reckoned with. I'm not perfect & I'll keep fighting spiritual battles, but I am deeper & wiser & stronger than I could have ever been. I BLOOMED where I was planted in each of the 4 places we lived in our first year of marriage! And because I did this, I'm moving forward-not backwards. PRAISE GOD! How can you take steps towards your dreams even if you're not living them yet? I believe we must be growing spiritually & professionally toward our dreams as often as possible. How? Here are a number of suggestions! 1.) How to bloom spiritually: >>READ YOUR BIBLE. >> PRAY - in your head & written down. >> Listen to praise music often. >> Rely on the Christians in your life for encouraging conversation, mentorship, advice, & prayer. >> Journal to reflect on your spiritual life. 2.) How to bloom professionally/reach goals: >> Keep a dream journal & be specific. >> Create vision boards/word webs to help develop your goals & dreams. >> PUT IN THE WORK. Enough said. >> Be an above-average employee. Stop complaining & respect your boss. >> Speak positively to others & speak life over your dreams. >> Find motivational books, blogs (Check! Ha), sermons, songs, & other secondary sources of inspiration. >> Apply for the job. Audition for the part. Put yourself out there because it's good for you. >> Appreciate where you're at & learn all that you can. Those are just some ideas. There are infinite ways you can bloom in life. Next time you feel like what you're up to is insignificant or not-so-figured-out, remember this verse: Zechariah 4:10 "Do not despise these small beginnings, for the LORD rejoiced to see the work begin..." Sometimes the sweetest seasons of life are the beginnings. Maybe you find yourself in a beginning as we speak. Life is always sweeter than you think! Get excited for the future, but don't forget to be excited about your right-now. Friendly reminder that you have been #BornToShine! Thanks for visiting my blog! Browse other recent posts on this site & connect with me on social media! I'm on Facebook, Instagram, & Twitter! Leave a comment below & let me know what you think! Sending love from North Dakota, Abby Grimaldi #BornToShine Blog I just got home from visiting my sister, brother-in-law, & their 6 week old baby! Weston James is his name, & he is CUTE! He's the first grandkid in our family so, as you can imagine, we are crazy for him! "Oh look, he's yawning!" "He moved his hand & it's like he's waving at me, oh my gosh!" He can't do much yet, but we aggressively love this kid!
Since we love him so much, everything he does is entertaining. We watch him all day - just existing. We speak blessings over him & talk about his future. "He'll have an awesome job, he'll be great at sports, he'll be a master violinist"...you know, shoot for the stars, kid! It's funny to me how much we gush over him when all he does at this point is breathe, blink, squirm, nap, eat, &...use diapers. Haha A wise older cousin of ours gave a great message at my sister's baby shower! She gave advice & shared stories of the love & adoration she has for her three kids. That day she made a spiritual point we won't ever forget. She told us this story: One day her oldest asked her, "Why do you love me SO much, mommy?" She could give him endless reasons. He is so cute & sweet, & that's just the beginning! But here's what came to her: "I love you so much, because you're MINE." And you know what? God loves you. Because you are HIS! So simple yet so good, right? I can be so achievement oriented at times. Competitive. Goal-seeking. I love that I work hard & focus my energy toward the things I am most passionate about, but I must remember that God's love for me does not hinge upon the things I do or do not do. He loves me so much (regardless of what I do) because I am HIS! No surprise, that kind of unconditional love inspires me to live a life pleasing of Him. It's my natural response despite living in a fallen world. Once you experience this love, it's natural to love God back. How can we love God back? I believe we can do so by studying His Word, praying, serving Him, loving others, & obeying His commands! The Bible says that humans are the pinnacle of God's creation because they are His image bearers. Beautiful. Gifted. Passionate. Loving. Creative. Intelligent. Compassionate. We each carry traits that we have inherited from our earthly fathers, but even more amazing, we carry traits that our Heavenly Father bears! Just as a parent loves to hear "your baby looks like you!" - our Heavenly Father takes delight in us bearing His image. He is so proud of His creation! We have been intelligently & perfectly formed by Him! This may seem weird, but I go crazy looking at my nephew's tiny fingernails. They're unbelievable to me. I know the whole "knitted me together in my mother's womb" (Psalm 139) scripture may seem overly poetic to some, but it IS incredible! Each organ & part working together in perfect harmony. Amazing! We "ooh & ahh" in wonder over a new baby, but did you ever think: Maybe God does this over us too? I love the thought that I can make God proud with the way I live my life & the choices I make. But it's His grace that really impresses me. He takes delight in me even when I mess up. Every time I pout about life or get short with someone, the Lord's love for me continues to shine through. He never turns his back on me. He takes delight in me & is looking to refine me with His grace & love. What if we could see ourselves like God sees us? What if could see ourselves as our families did when we were newborns? Full of potential & purpose. Perfectly made. Unique. I am saddened by the number of people around me who have forgotten their potential & brushed off how precious they are to their Heavenly Father. I love love LOVE Housefires' song "Good Good Father." To my fatherless friends or friends who have broken relationships with their fathers - Know that you are precious & valued beyond compare in the heart of Christ. He will never leave you or let you down. To my friends battling insecurity or feelings of insignificance - Your very existance is a miracle. Promise me, you'll let that truth sink into your heart for a while. God fashioned you just as you are with great intention & joy. He was delighted to create your spirit, mind, & body. He created you ON purpose & FOR a purpose. In a world so quick to minimize the humanity & potential of an unborn infant, I'm here to say, we've all been in that phase of life, and even then, we were fully human & full of significant, one-of-a-kind purpose. If you've ever doubted your importance on this earth, think again. No one has your fingerprints. There will never be another you. You are an intricately made collection of gifts, quirks, traits, & callings. You are no mistake. God created you to make an everlasting impression upon this world. What kind of story will you write? What kind of impression will you make? What kind of person will you become when you see yourself through your Heavenly Father's gracious eyes? For further study of this topic, read Psalm 139! Thank you for reading! Browse my past posts if you're new to my blog! I wholeheartedly believe you have been #BornToShine, & I would love to connect with you on social media to continue inspiring your faith walk & goal chasing. Find me on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, & YouTube! (Abby Grimaldi | @abbygrimaldi23) Sending God's love to you, Abby Grimaldi |
AuthorChristian Singer-Songwriter, Writer, Hockey Wife, & Fitness Fanatic. Nomad with North Dakota roots. Archives
January 2020
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